We all have fears that keep us from really living life. In some of the people that I interact with, I see what makes them fear doing something that they might want to do but are afraid of. I have a lot of fears, and sometimes I let them take control of me. It's in my nature, to be afraid.
As a little girl, normal things that would scare me are scary movies, and monsters under my bed. But in all reality I was afraid when we would move from one place to another. That first night in the new place was always the worst. The creaks, and noises coming from the house would keep me up most of the night. It took a lot for me to sleep in the new houses we lived in.
I remember when we lived in North Carolina, it was our first night at the new house. I couldn't fall asleep because my room was the one with the biggest window. There was a blind to cover the outside world from the little girl huddled in her bed. The crickets were chirping extra loud, and I wasn't used to it. I tossed and turned most of that night. For some reason, I remember getting a CD from the library that made me cry so much. It was the BeeGees, and it was a sad song. I replayed it so many times and began to think about my mom. For some reason, I had a feeling that I was going to lose her. I couldn't explain it at that time but it made me cry for some months. I never told my mom this because I didn't want her to worry. But for some months, I changed my whole outlook on a great many things. I sat in my room and stared outside, and didn't hang out with my family as much as what I used to.
To this day I still worry about my family. Now that there is a distance between us I can not see them as much as what I was so used to. The fear of losing them is the biggest one in my heart even with the fights and moments we don't talk.
I many fears, but I've let them take over me for so long that I haven't been able to live my life. It's time I take a stand and do the things that most make me worry or ave fears, its called living life.
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